Sam is a first time mom to a boy born in October 2021. She graduated in 2017 with a Doctor of Chiropractic degree, and opened her own practice when her son was just two months old. Sam sees patients out of her home in Harford County. You can sometimes find Sam at Rooted Willow’s Mom’s Night Out. This story was written by Sam and edited and formatted by the Rooted Willow Community team.

Like many people, my first visit to the chiropractor was due to pain.

I had fallen off a mechanical bull at 19 years old and the pain was so intense I couldn’t walk. At 19, the thought of not being able to walk across campus, let alone walk to the bathroom, was terrifying. Luckily, my mom had already been seeing a chiropractor and was able to get me an appointment. After only one or two visits I felt normal again. The doctor talked about the importance of removing interference in the nervous system, allowing the brain and body to communicate more efficiently and enabling a person to optimize their health.

I decided I was curious what changes could occur if I followed his recommendations, and honestly some of the most amazing things happened to me. The first thing I noticed was the knee pain I had experienced since I was 10 years old went away after a couple of weeks of care. This was a sharp pain that orthopedists told me was in my head, and that physical therapists couldn’t change, but it prevented me from running and would be uncomfortable at random times when I was walking. Then, after a few months, I noticed that I wasn’t getting headaches anymore. Without the headaches, my head felt clearer and it was easier to focus and study, and therefore my grades started improving. Within six months my health had started to improve dramatically in ways I didn’t expect.

I love what I do, because for my whole life I wanted to help people but I didn’t want to go into traditional medicine. Chiropractic gave me an opportunity to make a difference in the lives of so many people of all ages, from a few hours old to a great grandmother.

My dream, once I decided to be a chiropractor, was always to open my own business.

I remember sitting in class, during my second quarter of chiropractic school, when the name of my company came to me. As graduation approached, however, I psyched myself out about opening up my own practice and chose the safe, easy route of working for someone else. When I found out I was pregnant with my son I had three thoughts:

Oh my gosh, I’m so excited!
If I stay at my current job I’ll never see my baby grow up.
I’m somebody’s role model now.

I knew that working for myself was the only way I could be the mom I had always imagined I could be. By opening my own office, I was able to spend as much time as I wanted with my son. I could be present and enjoy his childhood. It gave me freedom and purpose. Now I feel like I am able to be the best version of myself for my family. Hopefully by facing my fears and going after my dreams, I can help empower my son in the future when he has to face these decisions. I don’t want him to be afraid to chase his dreams, but rather be willing to create opportunities for himself to achieve his goals.

Juggling caring for my son and caring for my patients is definitely a carefully-timed dance.

It was especially difficult when my son was younger. His attention span was short, so I would try and time clients around his naps, feeds, or when he was able to play. Every time I thought he was on a schedule, it would change again.

When I have new clients, I always make sure to have someone available to watch him. New client appointments are crucial to learning about a person, examining them thoroughly, and discussing any questions they may have. I don’t want my son to be a distraction for either them or myself. I always ask clients if they are comfortable with him being present during the follow up adjustment, and usually his happy energy is welcomed by my clients. He has a way of making my pediatric clients more comfortable, plus he loves the opportunity to socialize with other kids or adults.

I am not perfect at balancing my son and clients, but every day I learn something new, and I wouldn’t change how I practice chiropractic. My goal is to focus on my client while I am working with them, and to focus on my son when it is his time.

In some ways parenthood is exactly what I thought, but in others it’s so much more difficult.

I’m grateful that I am experiencing this journey and can be honest with other new mothers about the struggles I’ve had. Something I didn’t really expect is how lonely I felt the first couple of months after my son was born. Due to this experience, I try to make sure other moms I work with have access to resources like Rooted Willow Community so they find their village faster than I did. I think it’s important that other parents know they aren’t alone in the postpartum fourth trimester.

My views have changed about some things, and I have become more accepting. An example is that I thought I would be against all screen time, but sometimes an educational show really helps to calm my son or at least encourage him to sit still for a few minutes so I can finish up with a client or paperwork. Permitting screen time wasn’t part of my expectation of myself as a parent, but it is a tool I now utilize to my advantage when necessary.

The first few weeks of my son’s life were much more different than I had expected.

First, he was three weeks early and born via cesarean section instead of the unmedicated labor and vaginal birth I had envisioned. Second, he wasn’t gaining weight like he was supposed to for over a week. It may have been due to all the IV fluid I received, or it may have been that my milk came in slowly. One pediatrician had even started talking about the potential need for supplementing my milk with formula. Formula feeding wasn’t my goal, and I knew that if I had started supplementing, my chances of sticking with breastfeeding would decrease. I felt like I had failed him in both birthing him and breastfeeding him. I sought out another pediatrician for a second opinion, and fortunately, they were more supportive of my goals. They were able to give me some advice to assist in my breastfeeding journey.

As soon as I could drive, which was about a week after leaving the hospital, my son and I received chiropractic care. We both began to heal from our birth experience. By the time my son was a month old he went from gaining two ounces a week to almost a pound a week. We have been breastfeeding for almost 18 months now and he is doing better than ever.

If I were to give my pre-baby self some advice, I would encourage myself to spend the money on a doula and lactation consultant.

Regarding the doula, I think having someone whose whole job was to focus on me would have made a world of difference for my delivery. Plus, I learned after the fact that some doulas can even be present for a cesarean section. My husband could not be in the operating room with me because I received general anesthesia, and I wish I had someone there that could have held my hand before I went under.

The lactation consultants and the hospital were helpful, but because of COVID, the classes that exist at the hospital now were not available to me when my son was born. I wish something of that nature would have been available to me, because I think doing a weighted feed or having professional support as I started my breastfeeding journey would have helped prevent some of the tears I shed while trying to figure it out.

I would also tell myself to not be so stressed about letting go of control. I think part of why my son was breech was due to my inability to surrender control to the unknown. The unknown of when he would be born, and the unknown of what motherhood would be like, just to name a few. I needed to accept that I was now on his timeline instead of my own. I think a doula may have helped with this, or maybe they would have just been more honest with me about my fears of motherhood.

Due to the experiences I had, I provide my pregnant clients and postpartum mothers with referrals for prenatal doulas, postpartum doulas and lactation consultants.

I also have a mini library that clients can borrow from. I tell mothers that I am happy to be a safe space for them to vent or talk about their experiences with motherhood and help them find the resources they need for their journey.

The transition to motherhood is very challenging, whether it’s the first time or the fifth time. I truly believe it’s important that a mom with a new baby knows she’s not alone and that my office is a safe space for the feelings she’s having. She doesn’t have to hide or bury them. My office can be a starting point for a mom trying to build her support system.

I am just trying to absorb every experience and enjoy the ride.

Everyday I try to memorize how special my son is because this first year has gone by so quickly already. I want to remember all the moments and all the giggles. It’s amazing how suddenly you exit a phase of a child’s growth, even the negative ones that you are glad to leave behind. I’m so grateful for all the time I have been able to spend with my little boy. This first year in my journey of motherhood and being a business owner have been incredible and empowering. I’m so excited to see what comes next in our adventure.

One Mom’s Story: Sam, on Starting a Home Based Business as a New Mom