Stefanie is a first-time mom to a baby girl born in August 2021. She has been regularly attending After Baby Club meetings since her daughter was three weeks old and has also been exclusive pumping and feeding expressed milk since that time. This story was written by Stefanie and edited and formatted by the Rooted Willow Community team.

Exclusive pumping was not my first choice.

Before my baby was born I thought nursing was easy, and I wanted to exclusively nurse. However, at four days postpartum my plans changed very quickly. We had trouble getting a deep and correct latch due to a tongue and lip tie, and at my daughter’s first pediatrician appointment she had lost too much weight. My nipples were cracked, bleeding, and I was in agony every time I latched her. That’s when I decided to start pumping.

Originally my goal was only to pump temporarily. I wanted to get the lip and tongue tie revised, allow my nipples to heal, and ensure my daughter was gaining weight. However, around this time a new set of anxieties set in. Is my baby eating enough? How’s her weight gain? What is my supply like? I decided then to stick with pumping because it felt like the overall best choice for us.

At first, exclusive pumping was challenging and overwhelming.

I didn’t know anything about pumping when I started, so I was figuring all of this out from scratch. The parents around me had only ever nursed or fed formula. Pumping was a world I was never introduced to or knew anything about. Luckily my family was super supportive of me exclusive pumping and helped me in any way they could.

Getting the schedule down was the first thing I had to do. That’s hard in general and even harder during early postpartum. You’re already figuring out how to manage showering, eating, and everything in your daily life that you have to do. Figuring out pumping is on top of all of that. Once I established a pumping schedule that worked for me, I had to figure out what worked for my body and what I liked best. There are lots of options in terms of different pumps, slower or faster settings, and your setup (whether you pump into bottles or use collection cups).

I have a good pumping routine now, but it’s still hard. The absolute most challenging part for me is needing to maintain my pumping schedule. I plan my daily activities around my pumping times and often have to turn down or postpone things. (“I can’t, I gotta pump.”) I also get clogged milk ducts, which are a pain to deal with.

I have had several clogged ducts. I think I'm prone to them.

When I have a clogged duct, I start by massaging my breast. First I use reverse pressure (massaging back toward my chest wall), then massage toward my nipple. A Haakaa filled with warm water and epsom salt, a warm shower, taking the supplement sunflower lecithin, and/or using a hand pump sometimes helps to clear it. If all else fails, I schedule an appointment at a physical therapy location that does ultrasound therapy. The ultrasound breaks up the clog so it can clear.

In the beginning, incorrect flange sizing was the reason I was getting clogs. Other factors that I think have contributed to my clogs are wearing too tight of a bra, sleeping on my side or stomach, and not changing out the parts to my pump frequently enough (which causes some milk to be “left behind.”) Sometimes the clogs just appear when I’m pumping, with no apparent cause.

Stefanie was also featured in this article by GoodRx where she describes what it feels like to have a clogged duct.

I have a total of 8 breast pumps.

My personal collection consists of 2 Spectra S2s, Momcozy s12, Pumpables Genie Advance, Lansinoh manual pump, Medela manual pump, and Medela Pump In Style. I started collecting pumps in hopes to one day open my own business tailored to expecting and pumping moms. Pumping parents need opportunities to see and compare pumps, learn how they work and how each is different from the others, and get fitted for flanges.

Here's what I want new moms and pregnant parents to know about pumping.

Exclusive pumping takes a lot of dedication. Find your routine and have supportive people around you. You have to work really hard for the first 12 weeks to establish your supply, and it gets easier moving forward from there.

Get your nipples measured for correct flange sizing. This is super important! Improperly sized flanges can cause nipple pain, clogged ducts, and lower your milk supply. I was using the wrong size flange for a while before I learned it was wrong and how to find the right size for me.
Use the tricks that make your efforts more efficient. Change out the soft parts to your pump regularly, lubricate your flanges (I use olive oil), and make sure all your parts are dry before you start pumping. Have multiple sets of pump parts and use the fridge hack: put your pump parts in a plastic bag in the fridge between pump sessions. Then you only have to wash them once a day instead of multiple times throughout the day.
What works for one doesn’t work for all. It takes trial and error to figure out the best exclusive pumping system and routine for you, your body, and your life.

After Baby Club has been a significant part of my postpartum journey.

Motherhood can get lonely quickly. I had friends before becoming a mom, but a lot of them didn’t have kids. They couldn’t relate to my postpartum life with a baby, and it was really hard being able to connect with them about what I was going through.

The first thing I will always recommend to a new mom is to find a group that supports your specific stage of life, one that you can relate to and connect with. For me, After Baby Club is this group. I was apprehensive about joining at first, but at 3 weeks postpartum I decided to give it a try. Attending that first meeting was one of the best decisions I made. After Baby Club connected me with other women who were experiencing the same things I was, right there and then.

This group of women has supported my mentally and emotionally on everything from motherhood, caring for my baby, and just everyday life things. Meeting up with this group once a week has been great for me and my child. I get to connect with other moms, and my child gets to connect with other children!

My hopes are that with our future child I will be able to exclusively nurse.

But if for whatever reason I am unable to, I know I can pump or feed formula. Everyone’s journey is different. It’s okay to be upset and grieve the journey that you did not get to experience. No matter what your journey is, it’s the one that motherhood chose for you and that your baby needed.

One Mom’s Story: Stefanie, on Exclusive Pumping